Pediatric Grand Rounds

Pediatric Grand Rounds is up at Breath Spa for Kids. As always there are many wonderful contributions.

Such is life

Life is sure filled with irony. Evan officially entered into his pre-surgery quarantine period on Wednesday. I am supposed to be keeping him away from all the germy people out in the world so that he doesn't get sick while he is recovering from his surgery. Of course that means that I must get sick. I have been battling some random virus that came my way and knocked me on my butt. The symptoms have not been all that severe just a bit of stuffy nose and some chest congestion. A low grade fever has been the worst and most draining part of the whole thing. I think that I am over the worst of it because I am feeling much better now. Hopefully I will be able to survive a stir crazy toddler. At least he is very in love with his train table and is still very entertained by it.

Harold the Destroyer

I am fighting the good fight against entropy. I know that the universe tends towards disorder. I get it, I really do. However I am having huge issues with it right now because the level of entropy in my house is getting to be overwhelming. You may wonder what is making the entropy in my house a million times worse that it was previously. Harold the Destroyer is now living in my home and destroying it faster than I can maintain it. I spent all day just trying to straighten up the boy's room which should have taken me a few hours at most.

I can't believe how into everything Harry is. Either Evan was a saint of a child or I don't remember his infancy very well, because I don't remember it being this bad. Harry takes everything to the next level. Evan will empty a toy bin. Harry will empty all the bins and pull all of the bins down. Harry seems to find things to take apart that Evan never even imagined. We are childproofing our house all over again.

To top all of this destructive behaviour off Harry decided to pick today to show off his mad stair climbing skilz. That means that our lax baby gating of the stairs is going to have to ramp back up to obsessive in the extreme. I am so not ready for this!

Argh!

I am starting to feel sorry that I switched over to blogger beta. Now I can't comment on any non-beta blogger blog. Frustration abounds. So if I am not comment on your blog you know why.

Good

We had a wonderful weekend. It was perfectly lazy. We didn't go anywhere except for church and to the gas station to fill up for the trip home. Saturday I devoted to knitting and Sunday was a book day. In between I took naps and went to bed early.

My darling husband forgot to put our play pen in the car so we had to improvise our sleeping arrangements. I decided to put Evan to bed on the trundle bed in one of the spare bedrooms. It lay on the floor pretty low so Evan falling off would not be a big deal. Then I would lay on the bed with him until he went to sleep. This strategy actually worked very well, so well in fact that we are going to transition him to a twin mattress in short order. We had been thinking about bunk beds for the boys but are not sure how that will work out with Evan's non working hand.

One of Evan's favorite toys at grandma and grandpa's house was some sunglasses. I snapped a few highly hilarious pictures to show to his prom date.

This one is my all time favorite! He just look so hilarious.

Here is a cute one of Harry, lest any one accuse me of playing favorites.

Bad

Evan had rotten teeth. His front teeth have cavities on them to be more precise. I am feeling like a horrible mother because I put off taking him to the dentist for so long. Because of his age he will have to be sedated. Because of his heart it will have to be general anesthesia and he will have to be carefully monitored. That means that the fillings will have to be done at a major hospital. *sigh* This whole thing turned out to be a much bigger ordeal than I had anticipated.

I am not sure when or where even this all will take place. Evan's heart surgery is taking top billing. I am definitely being a bigger meanie about brushing. I am not letting him get away with a few half hearted swipes because he is throwing a temper tantrum. Mean mommy is in da house.

Fun Links

Here is another addition of fun links. We are going away for the long weekend, so I thought I would leave you with something fun to entertain you since I know that if I don't manage to post anything you will all be desolate. How is that for a nice long run on sentence!

• Are you stuck on a post? Are you having a hard time coming up with a witty beginning to your novel? This will help get rid of your writer's block in no time flat.
• Have you ever wanted a special and unique cake for your wedding or special occasion? Here is a truly unique cake.
• If you love Jane Austen as much as I do then this is the place for you. I heart Mr. Darcey.
• If you have a cat this might amuse you.
• I am so creeped out by this, it just seems so wrong on so many levels.
• Bring out the inner geek in your baby.
• This is of interest to mothers of boys but would also be helpful to anyone that lives with a male.
• It is never too early to start thinking about Halloween.
• An amusing video with an awesome explosion at the end.
• How smart are you?
  

Bargain hunting

I think that by now you all know that I am a huge fan of bargain hunting. My husband and I furnished the majority of our apartment with our garage sale finds when we got married. When I got pregnant it was only natural that we would get a lot of our baby things the same way. We did but some things new but a lot of it was used. We still go out now and then but have not had the time lately to do many garage sales. I am also very fond of clearance and sales when I am looking for things. I have to say that this is my favorite all time bargain.

What is your favorite find?

We have one happy little boy

Evan has become very obsessed with train tables. Every time we went to a place that had one it was next to impossible to pry him away. We had decided to try and make him one since my father-in-law has an ample supply of wood (much to my mother-in-law's dismay) and a nice workshop. It was the cheapest way we could think of to get Evan a nice set up.

I was also keeping my eyes open on Craig's list to see if a used one popped up but was not having much success on that front. Every time one came up it was too much money or too far away. I was about to give up when I saw one offered in a town near us for $25. I was thrilled and happy when I found out it was still available. It was a bit tricky to get home in the car but the excitement on Evan's face made it all worth it. Harry likes it too and has fun putting the trains in his mouth.

I am a shopping dynamo

We hit the mall this afternoon because Harry is in teething hell and I needed a break. Getting out seems to sooth the kids so I guess I lucked out that way. The main purpose behind the trip was to get a few more pair of PJ's for Evan at Old Navy but I also needed to get Evan some more shoes as well.

I left the mall with five Bath and Body Works soaps (they were on sale 5 for $15! I love love love smelly hand soaps), four pairs of shoes for Evan (bogo at Payless), four onesies in a size up (on clearance) from Old Navy along with a polo (on clearance) and two pairs of PJ's, and finally a few toys for Evan for his surgery. Wheew! I guess it is a good thing that I don't go to the mall too often or we would be broke.

On a lark I accepted when the sales lady offered to measure Evan's feet. I thought I was all knowing and that Evan only needed a size up from his size six shoes. Boy was I wrong! Evan is now a size 7 1/2. I should have guessed that his feet were too big when he threw a fit when I was putting on his church shoes this Sunday. I feel bad now for getting frustrated with him. Next time I am going to watch better so things like that don't happen. After all I would not want to stunt his growth.

Hee!

I am so tickled by this:
I had high hopes for a curly haired child because my husband could grow an afro even though he is very white. Evan teased me by coming out with a head of curly dark brown hair. Sadly he lost that hair and it was replaced with mildly wavy dark blond hair. I was crushed.

I hope that Harry keeps it up with the cute little curls. There is no way that I will buzz him like his brother if that happens. I might even let him grow it nice and long so I can put bows in it (kidding!). I would never do that to my son which is why I am going to change Harry's name (kidding again).

The watch update

Well Evan's lovely dollar store watch is no more. It quickly became apparent that the watch was truly worth what I payed for it as it quickly broke. We decided to splurge a bit and get Evan a cute six dollar monkey watch. This one has much better construction and actually fits his tiny wrist better. The second hand is the head of a monkey, it is so cute.

We even let Evan pick out what design he wanted. The choice was between the monkey and a Hot wheels watch. I was surprised when after much thought Evan pointed to the "keekee" (his way of saying monkey). I think it may have to do with one of his favorite books which has a monkey as a main character. I think the monkey is better than a liscenced character any way.

Some fun

Gina shared a link so you can make your own motivational posters. Have fun!

Why, oh why?

I have a feeling that there are a million toddlers that wear size 2T pajamas out there. I have been having the hardest time finding decent ones in that size for Evan. It started this summer when he out grew his old ones and I needed to get him his lighter summer pajamas.

I am pretty picky and I prefer cotton pajamas so pretty much I am stuck with Carter's or the off brand Carter's that they sell at Walmart or Target. I prefer the cotton ones because the polyester are just to scratchy and loaded with flame retardant chemicals. I am not particularly worried about any of the kids spontaneously combusting so I stick with close fitting cotton.

It is just barely the beginning of spring when I start my quest for the spring pajamas and already things are picked pretty clean. At Target I manage to find two sets of two in Evan's size so I go home mildly happy.

Later on during our vacation to Utah we are shopping again for PJ's because I forgot to pack some for Evan. We look and look but the pickings are even slimmer. We settle for a pair of Carter's knock offs and a set that have the car from the movie Cars on it. That set turned out super fun because after one washing the too big shorts shrunk to just right and the shirt turned into a belly shirt. Plus they were much more expensive than a set of my favorite Carter's knock offs.

For the upcoming winter I thought I would be prepared and I shopped ahead of time even though I prefer to wait for sales. I snagged some nice long sleeved cotton PJ's at Target no problem. I also wanted to get him some blanket sleepers since he could finally wear them again. This time only Carter's would do. They have some really nice microfiber sleepers that hold up nice and are ultra cute.

We made the trip to the outlet store. I see the clerk there that knows me by sight and insists on holding awkward conversations with me so I try and hide while searching for what I want. I search and search, for the toddler sizes. All I see is the 12 month and 18 month sizes but the other pile only had size 4 and up. After a bit of digging I finally find the toddler sizes hidden behind the infant sizes. I dig and dig some more and manage to only scare up a grand total of two 2t sized sleepers.

Evan starts throwing a temper tantrum because he can't steal the toy of another little girl so I take him out of the store leaving my husband to pay for the pajamas. I was not to thrilled with the designs, but by then I didn't care. At least I avoided the clerk. I just want to know where all those toddlers are that are wearing the pajama styles that I wanted.

Evan is very impressed with his pajamas that have "shoes" on them.

Pediactric Grand Rounds

Another wonderful edition of Pediatric Grand rounds is up. Go check it out!...................... Now!!........................... I mean it!!! .......................Why are you still here?................. GO!

Caution genius at work

I have decided that I am going to groom Evan to be a computer genius. I have to get an early start on this because everyone knows that if you don't get them started before they are three you are just too late. A lady in my ward gave us two toddler themed computer games and I thought it would be fun to see how Evan liked them. He had a blast even though I am not sure he even really knew what he was doing. We have an optical mouse (no more dirty mouse balls tee hee!) and he had fun with that too. He would randomly flip the mouse over and look at the light. Next stop a computer virus.

Reason #536 Evan is one strange kid

Evan wears a watch. He is two and a half and can't tell time but he wears his Elmo watch with pride. I picked it up at the dollar store on a whim, thinking it would be mildly entertaining at best. Later on I placed it on his arm and he loved it! He throws a fit whenever I have to take it off. When he sees it on his dresser first thing in the morning he is right there pointing to it to make sure that I do not forget to put it on. What a nutty kid I have.

The week is almost over

I can't believe that it is going to be Friday tomorrow. Time sure does fly when you are having fun. I like Fridays because my husband usually gets half days so we are often able to get a jump on the weekend fun. At the very least I get a nap which is always a plus. We don't have anything special planned but that is actually a plus. For the last few weeks we have been busy so it will be nice to kick back. Next weekend we are going to the in-laws for some Labor day fun which will probably mean another trip to a beach with even colder water than the one near my house. Evan has too much fun digging to pass up any chance to go to the beach.

A trip to the beach

These are some pictures of our trip to the beach when my parents came for a visit a couple of weeks ago. I was a bad mommy and forgot my camera so I had to wait for my parents to burn a CD and send me copies. They have dial up so I had to wait for them to be sent snail mail. How last century is that?

This is Harry and Evan playing on a rocking chair that was mine when I was a wee one. I can't believe that my parents still had it.

Evan dipping his feet in the super cold water. As you can see he was super thrilled.

The Pink Shovel of Death. Evan would get super annoyed when anyone would try and actually use this shovel even if he had not been using it a second ago.

I tried burying him in the sand but sadly he would not let me finish the job. I think he had some sort of crazy notion that I was trying to bury him alive. I wonder where he got that idea.

Harry going for a snack. The first thing he did upon discovering the sand was cram a handful in his mouth behind the back of his unsuspecting mother.

Mmmmmm.... salty and crunchy.

Another attempt to bury a child in the sand. This plot failed due to wiggling toes.

A close up of dirt face. Harry also fell face first onto my sand castle after he tried to pull up on it. The lesson he learned that day was very important. Build on solid foundations, not sand and life will go much better for you.

All in all it was a fun trip. We had to just about drag Evan away from the beach. Everyone came home utterly filthy and baths were had by all. Even the seagulls had a good time since they got to eat all the crumbs we left.

Youth

The Young Women did a service project with the Young Men tonight and as one of the fearless leaders in the Young Women I was in the thick of things. We were at a local Elementary school helping the teachers get ready for the start of the school year.

I was busy making copies when a teacher came up to me with more copying to be done. She stuck around and chatted with me for a bit. I was pretty suprised when she asked me if I was a student at the local high school. It then dawned on me that she thought I was one of the youth. I laughed and told her that I was not a student and that I was in fact almost ten years out of high school. She was also quite suprised when I told her that I was also a mother of two children.

I got teased the rest of the night by the other leaders that were there to witness the event. It is good to know that I do not look as old as I feel and that I can still pass as a teenager despite the gray that is creeping into my hair.

Nine months

Today is my cutie pie Harry's nine month birthday. I have to say that all things considered Harry has been a wonderful addition to the family. People say how hard having two kids is but honestly I have not felt that way one bit. There have been a few adjustments but my lifestyle has not changed all that drastically. I guess once you have one kid adding more is not that huge of a deal. The big change comes from being you to being you and mommy after that things just snap into place.

Harry is a whopping 20 pounds. He is basically average when you look at the charts but when he is compared to Evan at the same age he is a moose. Evan didn't hit 20 pounds until he was over a year old. I kind of wish that Harry was not too chunky because he is getting to be a pain to carry around. I do love his chubby thighs so I guess I will have to put up with my chunky little man.

The pediatrician remarked on how alike my boys look and I have to honestly say that I really do not see it. They have the same hair color but that is about it. Harry is a chubbin with blue eyes and thinner hair. Evan was a wiry little guy with a thick head of hair and tons of teeth. Maybe I am blind or something but I just don't see it.

We have a date

I have known about this for about a week or so but have not been really ready to say this. We have a date for Evan's next surgery. September 20th is the Big Day. There is just not enough time between now and then and yet there is too much time. Not enough time to be with my beautiful son. Not enough time to ever get mentally ready. Too much time to anticipate. Too much time to worry.

A trip to the dentist is in my future

On Sunday when Evan was screaming his head off because he did not want to sit in my lap out in the foyer (because he was being naughty in the chapel) I noticed that there was something odd about one of his teeth. Today I got a closer look at it and came to the awful conclusion that it would need to be looked at by a dentist. It seemed to me that it looked like a cavity but my husband thinks that it is a chipped tooth.

Luckily I made a stink with my husband a few months ago and he added our kids very reluctantly to our dental plan. The rate for a family is the same so adding Harry despite his youth was not going to cost us more but adding Evan tipped the balance from spouse to family. He didn't want to pay the 26 bucks a month to do it but I made him.

I then proceeded to not take Evan to the dentist. Due to Evan's heart defect he has to take a dose of antibiotic before an exam to prevent bacterial endocarditis. This whole process is complicated by the fact that Evan's blood thinner Warfarin (aka Coumadin) interacts with a ton of different common antibiotics. I just did not feel like having to mess with the whole issue. Adding to the fun is that there is exactly one pediatric dentist in a 35 mile radius that takes our insurance. Luckily she is close to us but if we don't like her then we are screwed.

I kind of hope that my husband is right and that it is a chipped tooth. That way I don't have to feel like a bad mom that did not keep up with my firstborn's oral health sufficiently.

My new look

Thanks for the compliments on my new look. I switched over to Blogger Beta and actually did this one with their new tools that make it easier for the average user to create a custom template. If you have blogger you should try it, there are also other fun tools that make blogging a lot easier.

Part of a conversation I overheard while my husband was talking on the phone with his mother

H: What did you want to do for Thanksgiving this year? What did we do last year? I can't remember.

Me butting in: We had Harry!

H: Oh yeah, that's right we had Harry!

Things I find funny

Evan, when he was a baby, was a breath holder. He would turn an impressive shade of blue while holding his breath when he became very ticked off. He grew out of it pretty quickly due to way his blood had to circulate after his second heart surgery. I didn't expect this, but Harry has followed in his brother's footsteps but has added his own hilarious twist to it.

Harry will do the standard breath holding, turning blue (which is impressive for a heart healthy child) but he will actually almost pass out. I will be getting him a bottle ready and he will be in the other room freaking out because he does not have his food ready right this second and I will hear nothing for a bit and then a thump from Harry falling over. Shuddering breaths will follow as he realizes that he needs to breathe to live.

I just find it hilarious when he does this. Don't ask me why because I have no idea why. Harry is generally a pretty mellow guy but when he gets mad he goes from mellow to pissed in 60 seconds. He was like that from birth. He would be sleeping peacefully and then bam! He was hungry and screaming bloody murder. There was none of that rooting around sucking on the fist stuff that the baby books talk about.

It will be interesting to see how this shows up when he becomes a toddler, who are notorious for being extremely changeable any way. I am anticipating some great tempertantrums from him. I think that I am going to have to buy a video camera soon so that I will have some blackmail videos for his teen years.

Free from the tube

On Thursday morning I encountered a situation eerily similar to this. This time I saw the tube laying innocently on the floor. I made a half hearted attempt to replace it but had pretty much decided that it had been out all night. Evan's GI doctor thought that we should just not worry about it since we are not using it any way. If we need to have it replaced then it can be done fairly easily, all the tricky work had already been don with the initial placement of the tube.

It sure is nice not having to worry about it any more. It feels strange to hug him or play rough with him and not have to worry about it tugging. Evan's shirts do not poke out in a strange spot any more. We can get him one piece footie PJs this winter and not have to worry about adapting it so that we can take care of his tube. Our night time routine is changed and we can finally think about dropping that last bottle which was used as a bribe to keep him still while we cleaned the area around his tube. Of course now he is not a cool boy with his tummy pierced, but I think that he will not be loosing face with his nursery friends, he has plenty of scars to compensate.

Time Travel

When I was digging around my photos looking for pictures of Daisy I stumbled across some of my baby pictures. Here are a few, be nice!

This is the only picture you will find of me in a bathing suit.

Rest in peace Daisy

Monday the best dog in the whole world was put to sleep due to complications from old age and an autoimmune disease called Lupus. Daisy was a wonderful companion and a very good friend. She put up with a lot of silly things that kids do to dogs. She listened to me when I was sad. I missed her more than my own family when I left home to go to college. I could call my parents on the phone but there was no way to talk to her when I was away. She will be greatly missed and I hope that some day my kids will be able to have a companion that is as wonderful Daisy was.

Yum!

Instead of making the blueberry cheesecake I make some blueberry cobbler. It was a lower fat option and took less time but still tasty. I must say that I love summer fruit. It is great to have an explosion of different fruits in season ready for you to try.

Cherries have long been a favorite of mine. We had a cherry tree in our yard when we first moved to Washington. It was heaven climbing up the tall tree and eating ripe cherries until we were full. The first year that we lived there there were worms in the cherries that were not noticed until my mother saw some in one of my sister's diapers. They learned quickly that they needed to spray for pests.

Strawberries are another favorite of mine. We have a nice patch of strawberries growing in our back patio. They are a bit heat stressed so they are not producing very well at the moment. I have a killer recipe for strawberry pie and I love making it often.

Peaches are my all time favorite. I love a nice and juicy peach on a warm summer day. My parents have a peach tree in their back yard and when they come and visit often they will bring some frozen peaches down with them. I think peach crisp is one of the best non-chocolate dessert ever.

My love of blueberries has only recently happened. I never really cared for them fresh but they are amazing when they are baked into things. Blueberry pancakes are a nice Saturday morning treat. What are some of your favorite summer fruits?

Gah!

I was going to make a blueberry cheese cake this evening. Instead I frittered away my time blogging and chatting with some of my online friends. Sigh.

My kids are full of crap

My kids have been pooping up a storm these last few weeks. It seems like every time I turn around I have a stinky diaper to deal with. Previous to this poop fest I had thought that I had the whole two kids in diapers thing under control. Two poopy diapers once a day, a piece of cake! There was no hurry for Evan to potty train, I can handle this easy.

Then it started. Harry had a case of the runs and was going every five seconds. I though that since this was a temporary thing that I could handle it just fine. After all it would end soon enough, right? Nope. It has not ended. He goes an average of four times daily. They are four good sized non-diarrhea diapers.

Evan has also increased his daily poopy diaper average lately. He had gone from an average of .75 poopy diapers a day to 1.5. I think his is because he is now eating more food due to the fact that we no longer tube feed him. At least I hope that is the reason.

It really would not be that bad if my children would sit still while I change them. Harry loves to roll over the second I get the diaper off. Both like to reach down and grab down there, resulting in poopy hands if mommy is not fast enough. I think that they are playing a secret game with me. They must share strategies when they are in bed in the morning. Now that they are sharing a room they have ample time to chat with each other. Sometimes in the morning I can even hear them giggling at each other. Nothing good can come of that. I am doomed!

My eyes are brown because I am full of crap!

I am much better at pooping than my brother, so my eyes are only tinged with brown.

Wierd Dream

I just had the wierdest dream last night. I had a dream that somehow I was working for or friends with Britany Spears. The good thing was that I got to tell her all the things that her mother obviously didn't about raising kids. Hopefully I also encouraged her to not dress like a hoochie momma.

Sadness

I received a letter in the mail yesterday informing me that my OB was leaving private practice and joining up with an HMO. Sadly this is becoming more and more common in the county I live in. The payouts for government sponsored health programs for the poor and elderly are incredibly low for this region. Private insurance follows suite and reduces their payouts because they are trying to maximize profits at any cost. The high cost of living coupled with low payouts is driving many doctors out of business.

It is going to be tough to find another doctor that is as good as he was. He was very low key which meshed with my personality well. He never hassled me because of the large amount of weight I gained while pregnant. I could not have really helped it because a lot of it was baby. Evan was 10 pounds 6 ounces at birth and Harry was 11 pounds 6 ounces. I also had a lot of water weight, by the time I was four weeks post partum I had peed all the weight away. It is a strange thing picking out a doctor that is going to look into your most private parts.

Pediactric Grand Rounds

Pediactric Grand rounds is up at Untelligent Design. Have fun taking the quiz!

Some people!

Last night shortly after the kids had finally settled down for to sleep I heard an odd noise. It sounded almost like Harry crying, but there were two voices making the noise. Since it sounded like the noise was coming from outside I flipped on the porch light and took a good look outside. Two cats were doing IT steps from my front door!

This annoys the heck out of me because those cats really should be fixed instead of procreating in front of my house. I am a huge advocate of pets being spayed and neutered because there is a huge glut of unwanted animals in animal shelters. There are a ton of low cost or free programs in this county so there is no excuse for those animals being there on my porch.

I have volunteered at animal shelters and I have worked at a vet clinic so I have seen first hand what it is like for abused and unwanted animals. It makes me sad that there are morons out there that will not do the right thing. If I had a net I would have caught those cats in their compromised state and taken them myself. Hmm... Maybe I will have to think something up just in case there is a next time.

Evil

My parents are here for a short visit and they brought the kids some new toys. These are not just any toys, they are the most insanely loud and annoying toys. Harry received a "book" that "reads" the child a nursery rhyme. Evan got a Thomas train that plays music and shoots steam out. My wonderful mother even taught Evan where the on/off button was so if I want any peace and quiet I will have to take the batteries out.

Thanks mom and dad!!!

A bad case of mommy brain

Today was one of those days that you will laugh about later on. Harry was being a grumpy little boy so I decided to go to the library with the kids. Yeah I know, a very crazy thing to do but I was desperate to get him out of the house. My kids are a bit odd because they could be having fits but once I take them out shopping or on an errand they perk right up becoming angles.

I had Evan all ready to go shoes and everything when I realized that I could not find my keys. Franticly I searched as Harry started crying because I sat him down. Evan was also getting frustrated that we were not leaving the house. Once he gets his shoes on he is ready to go and heaven help the person that gets his shoes on in vain. I search and search and no keys turn up. I had to give up in frustration and face the wrath of my children.

My husband comes home and I just had to get out of the house after being stuck in side. I bolted taking his keys and heading out to the library for some time with out the kids. I could hear Harry fussing in the background. The last two days had been pretty warm so I was excited about the prospect of spending time in my air conditioned car. I actually had a purse with me for a change, because in times of extreme heat I wear a skirt to help keep cool.

I did not take too much time in the library since I knew that I had to get back home to make dinner. I put my library card in my purse, slipping it into an outer pocket. It was then that I noticed my keys. They had been in the purse the whole time hiding! I had shaken the purse numerous times and dug through the inner pocket but missed looking in any other part of the purse. Some days I really think that I should be committed to a loony bin.

How long?

When Evan had his stroke the neurologist told me that he should be a normal little boy by one year post stroke. He would of course need physical therapy but with a little work you would not be able to tell him from any other child his age. I totally bought into that idea because I wanted Evan to as normal as he could be.

Evan is now roughly a year and a half post stroke and is still very visibly affected by it. The untrained eye might not see anything but it is not too hard for anyone that pays the slightest bit of attention to notice that he does not use his left arm. Evan is also much more prone to tripping and falling because of his left sided weakness. He has a peculiar gate that is especially noticeable when he is trying to hurry.

I have been struggling for some time with all of this. It is so hard to know when I should help him or when I should let him attempt to do something on his own. I worry that he will fail but sometimes he will surprise me by doing things in unexpected ways, succeeding where I had thought he would not.

When should I stop hoping that he will snap out of it and start using his hand? How long should I keep trying to encouraging him to keep trying? When should the focus of physical therapy change from regaining use to adaptive behaviors?

The prevailing wisdom is that if something has not improved by one year post stroke then it is very likely that it will not get any better. I can't really disagree with this, Evan's biggest gains came very quickly. His stubborn little hand is still there hanging off of his arm, seemingly unnoticed. Occasionally he will take the forgotten hand and use his good hand to make it touch something that particularly excites him. Today I saw him actually steady his sippy cup with his weak arm, briefly, but he still did it.

Things like that help give me hope that maybe he could gain more use of his hand. Sometimes, though, I wonder if I should stop hoping and start accepting. Once I start accepting it means that I am accepting that I am the mother of a child with a disability. Am I ready for that label for my son? I am just not sure.

Copious cuteness

What is in my diaper bag

Parent Hacks asked what people had in their diaper bags and I thought I would share here rather in the comment section because my list is so dang long.

1. one sippy cup
2. one bottle with water in it
3. formula container
   
4. three diapers size five
5. three diapers size three
6. a bag of wipes
7. a roll of plastic bags to put nasty diapers in
8. an assortment of small matchbox type cars
9. an assortment of rattles
   
10. an assortment of teething toys
11. a couple of little people figurines
12. a change of clothing for Harry
13. a bottle of antiseptic hand gel
14. moistened towlettes
15. a nasty thing wrapped up in a tissue that I am too scared to even identify
16. a flash light (one of Evan's favorite toys)
17. snacks: yogurt raisins, dried cherries, fruit snacks, gold fish crackers, fruit puffs and freeze dried fruit
18. a pack of tissues
19. assorted garbage
20. velcro that I bought at the store the other day
21. crayons
22. a syringe (just in case Evan's tube comes out while we are out of the house I can reinsert it)
23. the kid's immunization records
24. a calendar

Luckily I have a pretty nice diaper bag that is huge but very functional. We actually used to carry around one for each kid but I had to put a stop to that pretty quickly. It was just too hard when I was alone with both of the kids to haul two bags around. Generally I only take it for extended trips so having a big single bag made more sense.

I can't say that I will be sad to leave it behind when the time comes for that because I am not much of a bag person in the first place. I don't carry a purse. I use the pockets that are on my pants and use a wallet like a man. It just seems silly to keep a purse around when I have functional pockets most of the time.

Growing up

Evan has added a lot of words into his vocabulary recently. It sure is fun seeing him expand and grow. He has also started interacting with Harry more. When Harry was first born it was all jealousy and rage. That soon changed into Evan simply ignoring his brother for the most part.

Harry is now moving more and becoming a little person in his own right. Now that Harry can play and take toys from Evan he has deigned to notice his brother. Evan will even say baby now in refrence to Harry. Tonight Evan did the sweetest thing. Evan loves to kiss mommy so I suggested to him that he could kiss Harry. Evan then bent down and kissed his brother. It was very sweet. I will have to keep this memory in my mind for the times they fight, which I know will not be too far into the future.

Wanted!

Hi! My name is Evan and I am looking for a new mommy. Mine is horribly mean to me. She does awful things to my brother and I. Today she put sunscreen on me. She says that it is to help protect me from the sun and skin cancer but I think she just enjoys putting the cold stinky stuff on me to be mean. She also does horrible things like give me breakfast and telling me no.

My mommy is also horrible to my innocent baby brother Harry. She dresses the poor guy in clothing despite the fact that he would much rather crawl around in the nude. She also makes him stay on his back while he is getting his diaper changed. I think he should be allowed to squirm off free and breezy if he wants to.

I am looking for a pushover mom. One that will read my mind and know what every whine I make means. She will feed me chocolate ice cream for every meal. She will not make me take a nap ever. I want a mother that will pretty much let me do whatever I want to. All applicants can contact me at spoiledboy4321@brattyboy.com

Places I have lived

I have a hard time answering when people ask me where I am from. Like many people in modern-day America I have lived in many different places in my lifetime. My friends were surprised that I had moved around so much when my parents were not in the military. I sometimes wish that we had been able to stay in one place and truly set down deep roots in a community. Then I think about all the wonderful people that I would have missed meeting if we had stayed in one place.

I guess with all the moving around that we did when I was younger it is fitting that I would marry a man that would later join the military. There is a certain excitement to the whole process, the wondering when you will get orders, the research once you find out. It is totally hardcore to move to a place you have never been to and have a mere 10 days to find a place to live. Even more hardcore is to move to a place you have never been to, find an apartment in 10 days and then have your husband leave in a few weeks for a three month assignment.

We have two years left on a four year assignment. I am already thinking of our next move. You have to, because you have to plan ahead. This time will be different, this time will be my first move with kids. I am a little apprehensive about this. We have to find a place that will meet Evan's health needs and will at the same time meet my husband's career goals. The move will be stressful but I am already looking forward to the excitement and fun of seeing a new part of the country.

Places I have lived:

• Heber City, Utah. My birthplace. I don't remember much but I have been back since I was born and it seems like a nice enough town.
• Oklahoma. The place where I learned to ride my bike and broke my arm in the same day. I got chicken pox while in kindegarten and peed my pants in class while in the first grade. My two youngest sisters were born here.
• The Colombia River Gorge, Washington. I was depressed at first because of the rain but I soon learned to love the state of Washington and claim it as my home state. We lived in a small logging town. It is an amazingly beautiful area and we got to see the river every day through the amazing picture window in the house we were living in. My best friend there later turned out to have pot head parents that were growing weed in the forest. It was very neat to experience small town life.
• The Puget Sound, Washington. We settled here for many years. We lived in the very southern part in a suburb of a much bigger city. It was a heavily military area so most of my friends were military brats. There was some gang activity there but mostly things were pretty good. The camping was great. Our big vacations were spent at the Olympic National Forest and inVictoria British Colombia.
  
• I then spent some time in Eastern Washington going to college. Fun times those were.
• Then I moved back to Utah. My parents had been there for a few years already but I had stayed in Washington to go to school. I moved in with them because I had wanted to start saving money for a mission. Instead I met and married my husband.
• San Diego was our next stop and our first while in the military. I loved the weather there. I had my windows open all year, I was addicted to fresh air. We lived within walking distance of Sea World and got to enjoy the nightly fireworks that they put on during the summer. The only downer about the apartment was that is was in the flight path of the air port so there was a constant barrage of airplane noise. The San Diego zoo was also a high point of our stay there. It is so big that you can't even begin to see it in one day. We were only there a year and then it was on to
• The Bay Area! We have been here for three years now. It has been a wonderful place to live. The weather is nice and mild but has enough difference that there are actual seasons. I love the rain and this climate gives me enough rain with out over doing it. The boys were born here so this place will always have a spot in my heart. Sadly the house prices are insanely high so we will probably never be able to retire here.
  
• Who knows where we will be next? Not me!
  

I love California!

I just felt my first real Californian earth quake. It was a mere 4.4 but the strongest one that I have ever felt in my life. I think I had better go check on my 48 hour kit and make sure everything is where it should be.

This just cracked me up

Someone save me from myself

I really need to stop writing posts about how fulfilling motherhood is and how I am learning so much from my kids. It seems like I will write one of those and them the next day my life will be hell. Today kicked my butt and my family is lucky that I did not run away screaming.

Evan started off the day by having the worst whine fest ever. He was pissed that I put him at the table for breakfast. After doing the unthinkable and feeding him I made him get dressed. Torture! The ultimate insult came when I applied sunscreen on his body so that he would not get a sun burn. He spent a good hour in his crib after that sobbing his heart out. I had to put him in his room because I was about ready to loose it by then.

Harry was not doing too much more than his usual mommy must be in my sight or I will freak out. He also is in love with our modem and just has to crawl under the desk to play with it. We have millions of toys (ok I exaggerate but we still have a lot of them all around) and yet the thing he must have is the stupid modem. I have to cover the front of the desk with a blanket fastened on securely to keep the blinking lights out of sight.

My legs are sore right now because in order to work out my frustrations I took the kids on a long walk. I had hoped to walk out my frustrations but I ended up overdoing it and was barely able to function enough to get Evan lunch. I ended up spilling stuff several times in my attempts to put a simple lunch in front of a toddler that was not interested in eating it. Luckily they both took long naps and Harry even went to bed early. My husband's lifespan at this point, however, is not looking too good .

Thanks for all the nice comments on my new template. I had fun looking at templates on blogskins.com and picked out a few neat but simple ones. I had to tweak this one a bit so it has my own touch in there too.

Selfish

I just finished reading Parenting By Proxy by Dr Laura Schlessinger. I think the main thing that I took away from the book is that there is such a tendency in our current society to be incredibly selfish. People enter into a marriage with the expectation that it will only last until they find something better. They have kids as accessories, not a single thought is spared for anyone else.

A good example of that is this woman. She seems to be proud of the fact that she is barely involved in her children's lives. I am not saying that you should give over every part of yourself over to your children when they are born. A parent has to have a life outside of the kids but there is a fine line there. In order for you to be the biggest influence in your child's life you have to be there and available for your child. You have to show an interest in them and what they are doing.

I will admit that a newborn is super boring. All they do is eat sleep and poop. This early time is a crucial time however. It is the time when they learn to trust you. They learn that when they have a need you are there to take care of it. As the child grows and develops they become more interesting and start reflecting the things that you are teaching them back to you.

I don't find play groups mundane or boring. I enjoy teaching my sons new things. I love taking them to places that they have not been to before. I love seeing the look of awe on Evan's face when I show him something new and exciting. I am looking forward to being involved in his school work. Through him I will get to see things as I used to see them.

I guess the biggest difference between me and that woman is that I am not thinking how my children can entertain me. I don't think of my self when I am actively engaged with my children. I am thinking of them. Through my interactions with them I am slowly learning a Christ-like love, a love that is not selfish, a love that is pure.

More fun links

Welcome to the second edition of fun links.

• Link one is great if you have always wanted a dog but don't want any of the mess.
• Here is a place where you can generate any warning sign that you want.
• This is a link to a blog that has some amazing artwork on it.
• Here is a website with a lot of sage advice.
• And finally we have this, a little reminder for all my friends.

An embarrassment of riches

I was watching Oprah on Friday and it really made me think. The show was on the plight of people that work low wage jobs. It was amazing how hard these people work and yet how hard it is for them to get ahead.

Sometimes it is easy to not realize how good you have it. My husband is always feeling bad because he is not providing more money for the family. This is a crazy thing to get depressed about because we have so much. We are thrifty people so we have plenty of things with money to spare. I think the only item that we are really missing is a home of our own. The crazy price of housing has put that one thing out of our range. We could actually probably buy one but we would be far too over extended financially.

The media really seems to try hard to make people unhappy with what they have. There is so much advertising out there telling us that we must buy this and we will be happy. Get this because you deserve it. Even the great state of California operates through deficit spending. Every election there is one bond measure or another encouraging us to spend money that we do not have for this or that program.

Sometimes I get so frustrated with the irresponsibility of others. It is frustrating to see others blowing money like there is no tomorrow and seemingly not having any true consequences. Here we sit with all our investments, with our savings account and all the scrimping that we do. Sometimes I think about just going out and blowing it all on something fun. It would be easy but then I would regret it later on.

I am thankful for show that help me realize how lucky I am. I have a great family, a roof over my head, more food than I can eat. We also do not have to live from pay check to pay check worrying about what would happen if one of us got sick.

Silly

We got a catalog for Ikea and I was so excited it was almost pathetic. We had one nearby when I was living in San Diego and I totally got addicted to shopping there. I had hoped that I would be near one when I got pregnant so that I could get all my baby furniture there. Sadly the nearest one to us is too far away, waaaa! It sure is fun to look though.

So you think you can babysit

This morning I watched the daughter of a friend of mine. She is pregnant with number two and had an OB appointment. She watched Evan a lot when I was pregnant with Harry so I am returning the favor. I am even going to be the designated child watcher when she goes into labor.

We had an interesting discussion on which of the girls in our ward make acceptable babysitters. She had not had to use one yet because she had been trading babysitting for piano lessons with another mother. The night that my friend needs a sitter is back to school night so the other mother is not available. Now she has to take the plunge into securing the services of a teenager.

My criteria is that the girl (and I am saying girls because I don't have a high opinion of the boys in the ward so I would never hire one) is at least 14. The younger girls would do in a pinch but I try and avoid them because they are pretty giggly and flighty. I just don't have the feeling that much common sense is in those heads.

I have to like the girl. If I can't have a decent conversation with the girl then there is no way she is watching my children. I prefer literary girls but as there are not many of those in my ward I have to settle for her being able to have intelligent conversation. To me that is a sign that there is something going on in that teenager brain. I have been there I know how it is.

Sadly my last babysitter ended up aging out of rotation. Once the girls turn 16 they have a tendency to get jobs and lives. They are not available any more. I was really bummed about loosing my last babysitter because she was very literary, we even had the same taste in books. She actually reminded me a bit of me when I was that age. I guess that is what I am really looking for in a babysitter is a teenage version of me.

There is actually one girl in my ward that just about throws herself at my feet begging me to let her babysit. I have never used her because she is too eager. There is just something creepy about her obsession with my kids. I had toyed with the idea of hiring her older brother because he is the only boy that has even shown a passing interest in children but I didn't want to hurt this girl's feelings. My poor friend in her desperation is considering using this girl. It will be interesting to see how it turns out. At least she will not have to worry about scaring the girl off with the lack of TV or computer. This girl loves kids so much that I am sure that babysitting will be entertainment enough.