Wednesday, March 01, 2006
I find it very ironic that after helping to teach about the joys of motherhood to a bunch of teenaged girls I go through mothering hell. Harry is being the biggest pain right now. He has to be held almost all the time, he will not nap longer than a half hour and is getting up way too early in the morning.
I love my baby. I love holding him and playing with him and doing all that other mommy stuff. I just get so frustrated when I am trying to play with Evan only I can't really because if I put Harry down he screams bloody murder. I am so tired right now because after many weeks of sleeping solidly through the night he is waking up often.
Naps are out of the question for me to catch up on my sleep. Today was a great example of what has been going on. I give Harry a bottle, he falls asleep so I put him in his bed (where he seems to sleep a tiny bit better), get Evan lunch and put him down. Just as I doze off in bed the little stinker wakes up and will not even think about going back down.
This is all adding a lot of tarnish to the shiny joys of motherhood. I think the only thing that is keeping me from running away from home is the fact that I know that this too shall pass. I had many many moments like that with Evan and will have many moments like that with my next baby. It will pass and other challenges will arise and make me want to tear my hair out. Along with the frustrations comes the joy, the smiles, the laughter, the hugs.