Monday, June 25, 2007

The joys of motherhood

One of the things that you do not ever think about when you are dreaming of becoming a mother is all the indignities you will have to endure. When you are pregnant you jump right in with a multitude of pelvic exams, having strangers touch your stomach and having a human being kick the stuffing out of you from the inside all of which only mildly prepare you for the ultimate indignity of birth where people see parts of you that normally you would rather die of embarrassment than show in such a public way. My own husband has seem my ovaries and I haven't even seen those. Sadly the birth of the child is actually only the beginning. If you breastfeed you are always in danger of flashing perfect strangers while feeding your baby.

Lately it seems like every time I put Harry down after holding me he decides to take the neck of my shirt with him. If I am wearing anything with a bit of spandex in it and it has the slightest bit of a v to it I end up showing off my bra to who ever happens to be looking. Evan decided that one of his trains needed to be shoved down into my cleavage during sacrament meeting no less. He kept telling me that he wanted Percy in "mommy's pocket".

Last week at church I tried to wear one of my shorter skirts (something that was below the knees but not ankle length like most of my skirts) and I actually almost had it yanked off me several times by a leg hugging and skirt pulling Harry. I think if I am going to wear that skirt again I will have to wear suspenders with it. It is a shame because it is a really cute skirt and a nice color.

Modern women have long been harassing women who choose to have children and spend a good deal of time with them for dressing dowdy and frumpy. I have tried to keep a little bit of a kick to my wardrobe while maintaining my modesty, but I think that I am seriously going to have to change my mind on that after the train incident. I might just add a bunch of turtlenecks to my wardrobe, maybe even a mu mu or two. Those kids have me beat and I have a feeling it will get worse before it gets better.

6 comments:

chichimama said...

Hee hee. Same problem here. If you find a solution, let me know :-).

Karen said...

Don't worry. It changes. When they are teens they won't want to touch or hug you in public, and they themselves will be MORTIFIED to see mom's bra!!!!

On another note: I remember being in late labor--I walked into the hospital 10 cm dilated--and at that point I didn't care if the JANITOR delivered my baby!!!

Damselfly said...

Hee hee, kids don't know anything about modesty!

Gina said...

Mr. P still sort of grabs onto my shirts and pulls them up. The horror!

Emily Elizabeth said...

Well now that my soda has shot out through my nose with laughter at the thought of your kiddos and your "unmentionables", I would like to ask a different question. Is there a possibility, however slim, that I might not be randomly wet all the time? Thankfully, this time, I know from where the wetness came, but usually...no clue. Just no clue. But none of the answers are anything less than absolutely disgusting.

I'll look for an attractive mu-mu for you if you can find an attractive terrycloth dress for me...

BTW, I have found that keeping my hair long has distracted the kiddos from my clothes. They have absolutely no time to strip me down when they are swinging from the tendrils of my hair as though they are illustrating an evolution textbook.

Not sure if the infamous hair swinging is preferable to the non-consensual derobing. Let's see how I feel in a few years when I am bald and naked. LOL.

Midlife Midwife said...

ahhh, this post was just what the doctor ordered today...I needed a good laugh! Thanks!!!